Warning(s): Language.
Author’s Notes: Slightly short-ish chapter? I found it easier to break up this and the next chapter into two parts. *dodges bricks* Hope you guys can enjoy!

Chapter 17: A Date with Perfection?

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Your tears and smile look the same.

The path that splits into two lead to the same destination.

The throbbing of pain and love feel the same.

The only difference in this world

is how our eternal love seemed to age.

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Tense.

That was how Nino felt sitting at the table with the rest of Arashi.

The silence was tense. The muscles in his body were tense. The forced smiles were tense.

Nino wondered if he would ever regain the ability to feel, look forward to the future, and reach out his hand to others again. He wanted to throw away the emotions in his heart which made him fragile, weak, and pathetic. There was always a throbbing that assured him he was still alive and not dreaming a nightmare to deceive himself. Thoughts numb and painful floated into his conscious.

Numbness took over his body, shivers of instilled chills breaking out occasionally. He felt as if a hand was squeezing his chest tightly, trying to see how much pressure he could take before imploding within himself.

“Well I guess this is where we part.”

Nino’s head snapped up quickly, his neck cracking in an awkward position. He hadn’t noticed they’d already finished lunch, paid for the bill, and made their way outside of the building. Had his feet walked by their own will? His fingers trembled from an unspoken wish, and his eyes misted over with a confusion without a reason.

“I’ll have to go back to Zero for some work,” Sho muttered awkwardly. He brought up a hand to rub the back of his neck, eyes shifting from face to face. “We should do this some time again, yeah?”

‘Tense.’

The air stiffened with hesitancy and slight nods of heads. Sho gave a half-hearted smile so that the small lines that usually creased around his eyes didn’t appear. He gave a longer stare to Jun, an unreadable message flashing through his eyes before disappearing into masked cheerfulness. Raising a hand in a slight wave, he turned his back and walked away, merging with the small citizens of the city.

The four watched him with tired and helpless eyes, as if they tried to reach out, they wouldn’t be able to reach him.

“I’ll take my leave here, too, then,” Ohno mumbled.

“Because you have people waiting for you at home, don’t you, Riida?” Whether Jun’s question was meant to be malicious or not was lost in silence. Gritting his teeth, Ohno gave a mechanical nod along with a narrowed stare. “A daughter and a wife, I heard,” Jun continued on, looking at his nails absentmindedly and ignoring the growing tension.

“Yeah,” Ohno breathed uneasily. Nino looked at the older man, knowing that he wanted to leave already. “She’s not mine though.”

“Eh?” Nino and Jun asked in perfect synchronization. Aiba only cleared his throat in mild surprise.

“Reiko-chan,” Ohno said, shifting his feet on the ground awkwardly. “She’s not my child. She’s from Rika’s past lover.” Nino watched as Ohno’s hands fisted into a tight ball and raised his eyebrows in suspicion.

Ohno wasn’t the kind of person who would get jealous. Only…anger? seemed to show through his coffee eyes.

“Should we go together then, Riida?” Aiba offered kindly, tugging at the older man’s shirt sleeve like a small child. Ohno looked at Jun, turned his head to Aiba, and then nodded. A small, dim smile graced Aiba’s face. As they began to walk away together, Nino followed their backs until they disappeared into the crowd. Questions broke through his exhausted mind, penetrating his barriers of logic and resistance.

If Arashi had broken up as bitterly as he’d suspected, why did everyone still call each other with the customary nicknames? Why did Jun seem cold to the others? Why did he constantly attack Ohno? Why was he being left alone with Jun? Wasn’t Sho trying to keep him away from Jun?

‘What the fuck are they hiding?!’ Nino screamed inside his head painfully. Waves of sleepiness washed over his frustration, making the poor man sigh. Nothing made sense anymore. Nino just wanted to go back to America and forget that all this had happened. ‘But they’re family,’ Nino thought sullenly.

No matter what happened, Arashi was his family, and Nino couldn’t turn his back to them again. They’d stuck with him when he needed them; he would be nothing without them. He hadn’t enough strength or willpower to break away from the four familiar faces.  Strings tugged at his heart with guilt, causing Nino’s chest to reverberate in slight pain.

“Well then! Let’s go, Nino,” Jun said suddenly, startling the actor. Nino stared flabbergasted for a moment before recollecting himself.

“W-where?” Nino had half a mind to go back to his hotel and sleep, rather than staying with Jun and possibly learning the truth. ‘Since when were you ever scared of the truth? Poor weakling,’ a voice snarled.

Jun smiled like a Cheshire cat, his eyes squinting in some unknown pleasure. “How would you like to spend the rest of the day with me?” Nino fidgeted uncomfortably underneath his gaze.

‘A date with perfection, eh?’ he thought, deadpan with the idea. “Sure. Why not?” Nino shrugged casually, trying his best to ignore the way his heart seemed to pick up pace. Jun’s smile only grew.

“I know you couldn’t resist,” the model teased playfully, beginning to walk away. Checking his phone for the time, Nino’s eyes clouded with suspicion as it was quickly turning to four o’ clock. He chased after Jun briskly afterwards, catching up easily with the taller form.

‘I wonder what it’s like to have to run after someone and never be able to catch up to them.’

Nino felt frightened at the fleeting thought. Maybe he’d been the one to cause Arashi’s break up.

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